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Comedy and Romance in the Middle Ages = Ann quotes 
02:49am 06/03/2007
mood: amused

"O, great pool hall oracle, lend me guidance."

"All rape and adverbs."

The rest are hereCollapse )
More Joe Quotes than you can shake a stick at. Go ahead. I dare you. 
02:14pm 01/02/2006
mood: amused
So, I've been bad about posting these. but here are many, many Joe quotes (from Ancient Greek Theatre) dating back even to mid-October. I'll be better about posting in the future. Maybe.

"Now, you could have a spear wound in your groin and be. . . not up for it, as it were." -on sex in wartime

"Now remember, women don't have genetalia."

"I am stupid!" -impersonating Agamemnon

"You are so uncool." -on what happens in the afterworld if you don't have a great funneral

"There's been no children eaten, but there's been a lot of really bad sex!" -on Mourning Becomes Electra

"Now. What about the penis problem?"

"He's a very clutchy god. He doesn't let go." -on Hades

"Euripides- he's a card!"

"Your brother is you, but with a dick!" -on Antigone

"There's nothing better than a dead child." -on Iphigeneia

"Keep your guard up when your pants are down!"

"She's that special kind of virgin who can beat the shit out of your enemies!" -on Athene

"They really bounce!" -on sheep

"Hey you bastard! You're a bastard!" -on Oedipus

"Kill off your parents. Then they'll never threaten you again." -on Polybus and Merope

"This is not rape by Clarabell the Clown! This is rape by Heracles!"

"You have this miracle freak- the Virgin Mary. . . "

"He's a kind of man-penis!" -on Heracles

"No one can come through that door and try to stop me- I got tenure!" -on class running overtime

"God. Hates. You." -on Philoctetes

"I like that story. It makes me think of little baby Zeus!"

"Is there a god of assholes?"

"What's going on? Is Elijah here?" -on having an extra chair at the table

"Hamlet is like conference work."

"I'm a middle class shit! I drive a Toyota! I like to put in a CD and go home and have a little drinky. . . "

"He'll steal your opera and try to fuck you." -on Brecht

"Creon the asshole?"

There you have it. I'm sure more will be coming in the future.
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Joe Quotes 2005: Episode One 
09:59pm 26/09/2005
mood: amused
So I'm in Joe's Greek Theatre class this year *SQUEE* so I thought I'd give y'all some gems from the first few weeks of class:

"If you don't do it, you're fucked! Nobody wants to sit with you." -on libations

"Women get pregnant, men get dead." -on mortal-immortal relationships

"You can't go from point A to point B without getting raped!" -on The Suppliant Maidens

"Yay penis!"

"Persians! Pants! Pussies!" -on The Persians

"Whoa! Someone is having and orgasm!"

"That sounds a little Jewish to me."

"Trojan doesn't make his size" -on Zeus and contraceptives

"As soon as you get dead, Apollo leaves."

"What up?" -translating the Watchman's speech at the beginning of Agamemnon

There will be more to come, I promise. And yes, my icon is Xena and Gabrielle.
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04:00pm 21/05/2005
mood: bouncy
For Those in Need of Lauinger LoveCollapse )
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01:27am 13/04/2005
  A few more quotes for your reading pleasure ^__^ Also, I'm still taking requests for icons, so if you're so inspired, leave a comment.

Several weeks worth of Joe quotes, of courseCollapse )
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10:22pm 18/02/2005
mood: sick
Afraid there haven't been many good ones lately- most are very dependent on context.

Joe quotes, what else?Collapse )
Real tanks go "Pow!" 
01:35am 10/02/2005
mood: exhausted
More Joe quotes, finally ^__^

Read more...Collapse )

And more icons! Actually, I'm going to repost them all, because I've changed the links on all of them. If your icon suddenly disappears... well, you shouldn't have been hotlinking, anyway ^__~

New IconsCollapse )

Old iconsCollapse )

Ok. Whew. I think that's it. Enjoy, and remember to credit ^__^

(x-posted to blackdeathdenia and thelauingers so I don't have to retype everything)
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Applications? Bah! 
11:15pm 30/01/2005
mood: busy
Since I'd rather not be writing my study abroad essays (and blacksmithtony is a nasty, nasty distraction), I've made more icons. Take away, but please credit ^___^

Icons, icons, iconsCollapse )
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for people who are word dorks 
06:24pm 28/01/2005
  just like me..go check this website out and see where your favorite word sits:)

Oomph, grrrr and MGM 
12:13am 27/01/2005
  Afraid today's batch isn't as impressive as Monday's.

Wednesday's quotesCollapse )
Also, I've had too much time on my hands today, so there are "Joe Quotes Icons" to go along with these.

*is pathetic*Collapse )
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"Now we're really getting goosebumpy!" 
12:56am 25/01/2005
mood: amused
More Joe quotes for your entertainment. Also, he says "Hi!" to everyone who first greeted him... he made some comment comparing you all to cockroaches, also, but I think that was more in response to my comment about coming out of the woodwork. Anyway, he was very excited to hear from y'all and asked me many questions I could not answer, so I'm sure he'd love to receive correspondence.

Onto the quotesCollapse )
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01:18pm 20/01/2005
mood: amused
I had the pleasure of having my first Joe class yesterday, and I'm definitely looking forward to a semester's worth of him (I'm taking Shakespeare and Film)

"I will look at you with contempt as your hormones make you writhe."
"If you're here, I assume you love Shakespeare. If not... too fucking bad."
"We'll finish with Hamlet because... what the hell."

Look forward to many more to come ^___^

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Mazel Tov! 
07:21pm 30/08/2004
  It makes me happy to know that this community exists! I had Ann as a don from 1994-1998 (first-year studies was Medieval Writers), and had Joe for one semester in Fall of 1997 (Sacred Theatre of the Middle Ages), and loved all of it, and all of them, to death! It took me four years, though, to realize that they're Jewish! What a fool I am! I got to see them in 2003 when I was back in NY for a conference at NYU, and that was great.

As for great Ann and/or Joe quotes, unfortunately I don't have my notebooks here, but I remember a few from Ann that have stuck with me:

(on the Song of Roland) "This poem takes itself a little bit too seriously, don't you find? I mean if this were an Anglo-Saxon poem, there'd be some irony in it, they'd be saying things like 'That was not an easy sleep he had, / For he was dead.'"

While I don't have the exact quote down, there was also her thing about suspecting that there is a sexual connotation in Chaucer, and by extension any medieval lit: that if you thought there might be, you may as well assume that there is. She illustrated her point by telling us about the perverts on the subway who might rub up against young girls, and that her father always advised that in approaching such individuals, if you suspected it for a second, you should just assume that they were doing it, even if they weren't.

Then there was the time that I had my brother visiting and we went to pay Joe a visit in his office, and at the time he had an attractive female donnee with him, and he said that he'd be with us that evening at a reception, and that meanwhile he'd been "slaving over a hot donnee," and we all had a laugh at that, because the insertion of "donnee" for "stove" was a little unfortunate, depending on your viewpoint...
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A couple of my favorites 
02:21pm 29/08/2004
  Joe was my don and secondary father figure for my four years at Sarah Lawrence. I am convinced, in fact, that if he didn't save my life a couple of times, he definitely preserved my sanity (just ask 'ree). We did "FYS: Myth & Drama" and his "Ibsen and Chekhov" seminar. It was bliss. With Ann, I took her lecture on "Allegories of Love". It was in this class, with my trusty fellow crack-up, Cliffie, that Ann and I first sparred. I mean that in a nice way...

Ann on Ovid: "He's a fascinating man. I'd love to have him over for a dinner party. Just.. with my husband."

Ann on Cliff and I, after we cracked a series of jokes about 'The Faerie Queen' in group seminar: "I've finally figured out what it is about you two! You're cut-ups!"

Ann, on the cigarette we were smoking outside her class: "Oh, that's fine. Just go ahead and smoke your weed!" (That one confused us for a moment, until we remembered that Ann is probably the only person in the world who would still use sixteenth century slang.)

I have more in my old notebooks and I must scour them...
Joe Quotes 
12:22am 23/01/2004
mood: geeky
Ok, so, Ree and Paul and others do not have the privilege of having Joe. I therefore must supply them with quotes. Here are some of the best ones from the fall:

"Isn't this fun so far, you get to wear clothes."
"You're dog is good. You're a shit."
"I once taught this play at Sing-Sing. I'll talk more about that later."
"That's a good phrase in case you don't like someone, 'Trojan satrap!"
"I'm going to to listen to Hags of Terror. They are down in that club on 12th street."
"Could you imagine double dating these two? Going out to dinner? Man, you'd need some heavy drugs to get through that one."
"[Bush] should read Antigone. I should sit down and talk with him."
"You have to wipe up after this one."
"You don't give [Athene] a friendly little touch. She'll stick her spear up your ass."
"Gee mom! I didn't know you were into that."
"Let's try to imagine frolicsome penises. Are we imagining? Ok, good."
"I'm not giving you any zen shit here."
"Can you imagine two old people doing it? Talk about clinging to the earth wrongfully."
"Me? I'm with the female naked acrobats. I'll take a camel sandwich and I'll watch."
"They're doofuses. Or in Latin, doofi."
"This is a quotation. This is not me being Joe."
"Cross-dressing. Hey, this is good."
"Once it goes outside, the sky's the limit. See, what I just said? That was a pun."
"Really, you should think of God as Elvis here."
"Death is a great way to end a play. Play's over, guy's dead, Death of a Salesman."
"Here I am. Slaving over a hot lecture."
"We know men are interchangeable when you come down to it. Right? You just plug 'em in and there you go!"
"Hamlet wasn't going to the local community college."
"'To Be or Not To Be? That is the question.' Shit, when is this due?"
"The play might as well end there, but Hamlet is allowed to be a pirate."
"Joe's talking about guys taking of their shirts."
"I think you could pick up girls with a dog named Mengo the Fat."

And those are just the prime ones. There are tons more to go around.
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By'r lakin a parlous fear! 
07:47am 21/06/2003
mood: cynical
Since two of us Lauingerites are doing Midsummer this summer (sorry Paul), I figured I would post up some Joe quotes about the lovely play.

“He was always weird, Shakespeare…”
“A penis is a sort of funny thing…it steals the show.”
"This is her number one big Bozo.”
“ ‘Her virgin patent had not been yielded up’…that’s a nice way of putting it.”
“ ‘Legitimate sexual event’…what a phrase…. ‘Are we having a legitimate sexual event?’”
“Hey, last night in my dreams we really got it on and it was great!”
̶ 0;Children? Little naked children?”
“Sex is not something to salute and do, but it’s something, say, you…fall into.”
“Oh man! Babes in mud!!”
“Fairy Juice Joy.”

I hope everyone is having a great summer!!
11:01am 15/05/2003
this morning, I had my last Joe Lauinger class ever.
This makes me sad.
Ok, sad and happy.
Sad because it's my last and I loved this class, and this teacher (Meredith knows just how I mean that..) and it brought me much joy to have a knowledgeable, understanding, and stimulating teacher for a class that I really deeply connected to and enjoyed.
Happy because I got to be in it at all...many people were turned away, including a few seniors that Joe had put on the top of his priority list...I was one of the lucky ones.
::sigh:: Damn I'm going to miss this.
I do have my class notes, and my list of Joe-isms, which I might share at some point with the rest of you...::grin::
much love...
Last class. . . 
01:21am 15/05/2003
  Today was my last class with Ann. :-( But I'm thinking about taking Joe's "Text and Theatre' lecture next year. Must have the full Lauinger experience before I graduate.  
02:15am 09/05/2003
  i have sooo many quote from my history of english with anne...

"because shes a nice lady"
"you cant say lady"
"you cant say nice"
"shes a bitch"
"shes a worthy female"

"ill be dead, twice in one class"

"i jumped his bones makes it a transitive verb"
Two Joe quotes taken from class this morning 
08:21pm 08/05/2003
  "Maybe it's just me, but when I see two people having sex, I'm watching them."
"You go to a porn star...I mean, porn store and buy anything in Denmark; you go to a religious store and buy a crucifix, gimme an image of the Virgin Mary, too."